Lunch with homeless person

Challenge 1 Goal: Find homeless person in Central Square, Cambridge and offer to buy them lunch in exchange for them telling me stories about their life

Attempt 1: (Sunday around 1pm) Saw a heavy-set blind gentleman asking for change in front of the Starbucks in Central Square. While putting changeg in his metal can I asked how he was doing and he said he was very hot (he was standing in the bright sunshine). He explained that he would be moving on to Harvard square soon since Central Square was "slow" today, but that Harvard Square was much more territorial and he would often be asked to move by individuals who claimed to be asking for change in that area first - which he can't confirm because he can't see. I asked him if he had had lunch yet and he had: a turkey sandwich, but he asked if I could get him a glass of water. I went into starbucks and got ice water with a straw. After giving him the water I walked away with brilliant butterflies in my stomach.

Attempt 2: Later I scouted the area for homeless people not currently A. passed out or B. yelling at random people. I passed a blond woman around 45years old holding a sign reading "homeless / clean&sober / please help". I paused by the entrance to the T-stop, turned around, and put change in her cup and asked her if she had eaten lunch yet. She said she had eaten at the Salvation Army earlier, so I wished her luck and walked away. I got back to the T-stop entrance and paused again: I should really talk to this woman, so I got out a $10 bill and went back to her and said I would like to give her some money in exchange for her telling me about her life. She brushed away the bill and said hesitantly that it was a long story. I told her I would be intereted in anything she would care to share with me and so she started the story of her life that has led her to be homeless and begging for change in Central Square, which began "This is relaly a story of domestic violence....". (Her personal history was not told chronologically but I will try to present it time-sequentially here):

Twenty-five years ago her mother was very sick and she was emotionally dependent on her boyfriend at the time for support. He was always controlling but after they were married he became increasingly violent. He didn't allow her to go out with friends or spend any money herself even though she had helped him purchase two houses over their 20 year marriage. She had wanted to leave him for a long time but he wouldn't let her leave, threatening to kill her and himself. Finally she got a restraining order (which she cited as the biggest mistake she ever made), but he found her and got her to come back home. He stopped threatening to kill her and she lived with him for another 3 years. After 23 years of marriage, he said that she was driving him crazy and that she could leave and so she left with a small amount of money that he gave her. They never had children.

She goes to group therapy, has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and is in temporary housing. She struggles daily to take her medication and have "good days", but nevertheless she has been hospitalized several times in the last year.

I gave her a few dollars, which I assured her I could afford, and walked away with a mix of emotions. I was excited because had overcome a fear-induced barrier and was not entirely surpprised how happy/grateful she was to share stories about her life. I was sad because there are so many stories like this that are genuinely tough. She is struggling - and that counts for a lot. When you have a serious mental illness you need a strong suppoprt network through hospitals, friends/family and a healthy living environment to prevent drug abuse and continued abusive realtionships.